"As I interpret the Course, 'our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine"
Today we celebrated our first glorious spring weekend day with a barbeque at my mom's house. It was also my grandpas and my youngest brothers 21st birthday. When we arrived mom was already serving food. I grabbed a plate of carne asada and sat down to talk to my brothers girlfriend. I promptly stuffed my second bite in my mouth, swallowed and immediately felt the meat get lodged in my throat. At first I calmly tried to swallow harder. Then I politely excused myself from the table and tried coughing it out. By this time Eric was at my side, gently pounding my back. I continued to cough and then I started to cough up phlegm. Regardless of what was coming out, the meat continued to stay in. At this point, I heard Eric tell my mom to call 911. I nodded my head and confirmed that calling 911 was a good idea, all the while continuing to cough and gasp for air.
By then, Eric started to Heimlich maneuver, to no avail. Then my mom tried. Then my uncle. Eric talked to the 911 operator and we heard the ambulance in the distance. By this time my brother and his friend Scott arrived home from golfing. My brother walked in and immediately started saying " what the fuck is wrong?" I could hear him being totally alarmed and I wanted to turn around and tell him I was okay. Clearly I wasn't, and I couldn't talk and I began to panic. I continued to cough and gasp and I was beginning to really worry that I was going to pass out. Scott, my brother's friend is an EMT/Firefighter and he gave me the heimlich maneuver as well, really hard. By the second time I was certain he was going to crack my ribs and brushed him away. I continued to semi-throw up massive phlegm and struggled to breath.
Around this time the paramedic arrived. He began to give me the heimlich maneuver as well, again to no avail. He tried 3 or 4 times before he walked me out to the ambulance while I continued to choke. Literally he walked me out while performing the heimlich.
There was some confusion as to who was going to ride in the ambulance with me. I know my mom wanted to go and jumped in the front seat, but rightfully it should have been Eric. He jumped in the car with my uncle and the ambulance took off.
The paramedic handed me some gauze and told me I could throw up any where, if I could manage to vomit. I was trying to maintain my dignity and bent over the trash can and continued to try to cough. The paramedic, Ben, began to take out forceps and was going to manually extract the meat.
Suddenly, I coughed and all the sudden the meat went down my throat. It just went down! I turned around and said, "I'm fine, it went down!". We were only a block away from my mom's house and I stopped choking! They pulled over and they assessed me; took my blood pressure, listened to my heart, yadda, yadda. Mom went home to check on Kayla, who was rightfully freaking out.
I was mortified! The ambulance made me sign some paperwork and they took us home. Ben the paramedic came in to tease Scott about giving me the Heimlich so hard. In fact, the joke for the rest of the night was that Scott gave it to me hard from behind!
The weirdest thing was that I was super cognizant of everything going around me. I could hear every conversation and I wanted to respond. The hardest part was keeping my dignity while choking. There is just no attractive way to almost die. Although, the family did give me props on perfectly balancing in my heels and my brother's girlfriend tied my hair back at some point.
So, I didn't die, thank goodness. My throat is sore, my ribs hurt, but I am not in tomorrow's obituaries!
Recently two ducks began visiting Kayla’s school; a mommy duck and a daddy duck.Their visits became more and more frequent and the school posted signs to discourage the kids from chasing the ducks in the parking lot.The ducks became kind of like a school mascot and all of the classes took turns going out and feeding and learning about the ducks.These ducks were actually very friendly with the children.
Mr. and Mrs. Duck made their home across the street in the marshy field.Every morning they would make the trek across the two-lane road to get to the grass at the school.K’s teacher was concerned that the ducks would get hurt by the speeding cars, even though the street is a school zone.One day I even helped her drag big orange cones into the center lane to try to persuade the cars to slow down.Obviously someone removed the cones because it isn’t exactly lawful to put them there.
One day a huge hawk came by and swooped up mamma duck by the neck.One of the other teachers was watching from the door and quickly ran out and yelled at the hawk.Luckily the hawk immediately released mamma duck and she went unharmed, despite the fall!
Last week Kayla relayed, with tears in her eyes, that mamma duck had been run over.Ever since then daddy duck has been absent from the grass in front of the school, with the exception of this morning.He was sitting all by himself in his usual spot where Ms. Duck used to sit with him. All alone. Sad, isn’t it?AND, she survives the circle of life by human intervention to be killed by a car!Such irony!
I took the day off tomorrow, after I have already taken Monday and ½ of Tuesday off due to K’s illness (she is feeling much better!).It is nearly 6 months into the new year and I have taken only 12 hours of paid time off.That is what, a day and a ½ for six months?!We have a “use it or lose it” policy in regards to our time off and I have 21 days to use. I better get to it since I end up giving back time every year.
Tomorrow is camping and I can’t wait!I just want to relax in the hot sun with nothing to do except sunbathe, water ski, eat and drink!However, I am not looking forward to sister drama.Her and her girlfriend have broken up and made up at least a dozen times in the last week.I can’t even keep track anymore whether my sister is moving out or if her girlfriend is coming camping with us.